Written by Dipul Patel on Thursday, 24 April 2008 Category:Movies_Dip Hits:4157
Last week, I was knocked ever so slightly, and gently in the face by a Softball during practice. Now, this has nothing to do with my clearly awesome athletic talent, as I was fielding another ball when one was hit at my head, line drive to the face.
I'm so awesome even softballs can't resist it. Sometimes I wish I could turn awesome off.
So, due to this slight hit in the face, I am deviating from my norm, and trying to siphon some awesome into a list.
I am going to go through 5 movies so devastatingly great that you should immediately leave whatever computer you are reading this from, (turn off the monitor to stay GREEN!!! and prevent it from exploding from the greatness that is about to happen), and purchase, rent or download these movies.
Here is the fun part - here are five movies that I feel, may have slipped through the cracks. So do yourself and anyone you care about a favor. Don't go to the theater this weekend. Look, a single movie at a theater will cost you 20 bucks for admission, plus 20 bucks for snacks (and if you're by some miracle on a date, you know you will have to buy some).
This entire collection I have here, is 77 bucks new, or 38 used. For a collection of hand picked incredible movies.
If you have seen one/some of these, you know I'm right, so you should buy the rest immediately. Then, sit at home and enjoy a good seat, without morons kicking your chair, or answering their phones and cheap food and beverage. Tough to beat that.
Try this for a year, watch movies on DVD. Buy them used or use Netflix, and by the end of the year, if you replace going to just 1 movie a week with a DVD, you would have saved enough to buy a decent HDTV, and parted with the aggravation of going to the theater. Sure, there are certain movies that need to be seen on the big screen, but those are few and far between. We've all been suckered into crap like, "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou" which made me want to claw my eyes out. We've all gone to movies like I Am Legend and left wondering why I just blew money. Now, I actually liked I am Legend, until I read Jimmy's Rant on it. Now I can't watch it again.
These are in no particular order.
1) Frailty (Horror/Thriller) [imdb] - Skip 88 Minutes [imdb] and watch this instead.
This is a great horror/thriller starring Matthew McConaughey before he
became the shirtless fruit that he is now. This is when I still
considered him a man, and not some prissy boy trancing around like
peter pan.
Seriously, WTF.
Basically, Matthew's character (Fenton) walks into the FBI and claims
that he knows who a serial killer is. He says he has to talk to the
lead agent, which is Powers Boothe (Playing Agent Doyle). Now, look at
Powers booth, this man is so full of win Burt Reynolds is envious of
his facial hair.
Don't look him in the eyes. Seriously just don't.
Anyway, the story is about this serial killer named "God's Hands
Killer", and Fenton claims to Agent Doyle, that his father (played by
Bill Paxton) is the serial killer. Apparently, his dad is a religious
fanatic, and has received a message from god to kill demons.
RIIIIIGHT.
I know what you're thinking, this movie is crap.
It's not.
It's Awesome.
I can't tell you any more before I would ruin it. I basically watched
this movie because someone in college recommended it and handed me the
DVD (Won it in poker boyeee).
This movie is like 4 bucks shipped on amazon used, or 9 new. Buy it.
Here is a trailer for you
2) Thank You for Smoking (Comedy) [imdb] - Skip Drillbit Taylor [imdb] or Superhero Movie [imdb]
This movie, is just plain amazing. From start to finish.
It starts Aaron Eckhart as Nick Naylor, who is a lobbyist for Big
Tobacco. This movie is so fantastic on so many levels. I had never
paid much attention to Aaron Eckhart before this movie, even though
he's been in some movies I've seen, like Any Given Sunday. He's also
been in some real crap, like the Core and Paycheck. Oh, he was in the
Pledge too...good god.
Doesn't matter. He rules in this movie.
Sultan of Spin
Let's begin, Nick gets rich by convincing people to smoke. Hey, good
for him. He is COMPLETELY upfront about his job, and he doesn't care.
Does this make him someone with no conscience? I don't think so. I
didn't immediately go pick up a cigarette, and most people wouldn't.
Morons do.
Sorry, if you smoke, you are a moron.
Moving on, Nick makes money on morons, and I am okay with it.
I love this movie because it is refreshing. This movie had me laughing
so much, that I sounded like a Hyena on NOS. It's satirical on the level of Southpark, in that on the
surface it is one thing, but if you scratch the surface a little, it
just ends up being funnier. The way this guy just completely spins
everything is magic.
Oh, and it has Robert Duvall as the "Captain" of big tobacco, Katie
Holmes as a slutty Reporter, William H. Macy as an uptight,
anti-smoking senator and Rob Lowe as a Hollywood super-agent.
This movie is 4 bucks used, or 11 bucks new. Buy it too.
Here is a trailer. Fantastic.
3) Spy Game (Action/Thriller) [imdb] - Skip Vantage Point [imdb]
WOW.
This movie. Holy crap. I was amazed. I sometimes sit in meetings and
realize how useless they are. Some meetings are such a waste of time, I
would have been better off ironing my socks and underwear, or giving
myself a manicure, or you know, searing my eyes with a hot iron.
This is a movie, is about just this, what one would believe is an unproductive meeting. A man, Nathan Muir (Robert Redford),
is sitting in a meeting a day before his retirement from the CIA and is
talking about how he trained Tom Bishop (Brad Pitt), and discussing his
recent arrest.
Tom has been arrested in China, and has 24 hours to live unless the
President of the United States intervenes, which of course, the
President can't do. (What is a CIA operative doing in China, surely
he's trying to buy a Wii as we can't get them here).
This movie is so deep. Robert Redford and Brad Pitt are simply
amazing, the rest of the cast could have been monkeys throwing poop at
each other and this movie would have still completely owned.
I don't want to say more as I watched this movie expecting nothing and came out loving it.
This movie is about 4 bucks shipped used, and 9 bucks new. Go buy it now, seriously.
Here is a trailer, it's awesome
4) Wirey Spindell (Comedy) [imdb] Skip everything, It's that ridiculous.
If you have seen this movie, please comment below. I have never met anyone else who has seen it, without my recommending it.
It was 3 am, I just stumbled into my apartment in philly and this was
on showtime. I turned it on to just relax and end up watching the
whole thing.
This movie is about a real troubled guy who is about to get married,
and takes us through his history, and it is ridiculously troubling and
horribly funny.
The movie is basically Wirey sitting on a bench talking to his step-mother's ex lesbian lover. The beauty of this movie, its a semi-autobiography about the director of the movie!
It starts with his childhood. When he is a kid, he is just awesome.
Here is a quote from the movie: "They say that God watches over kids and drunks. Well I was a kid drunk."
That about sums up the feel of this movie.
Even if you don't like it, you will be intrigued enough to watch the whole thing. I found it hilarious.
This movie is almost 30 bucks on amazon new, but only 8 bucks used. It's fantastic.
5) An Evening with Kevin Smith (Comedy)[imdb] - Skip Drillbit Taylor, Superhero Movie or any other comedy until you watch this.
This is a montage of QA sessions that Kevin Smith (Of Clerks, Mallrats, Dogma, etc) held at universities throughout the nation. We all know, Montages are awesome.
Dammit Gary!
It is 3 hours and 45 minutes of pure comedy, you wont stop laughing. It is so awesome hearing about this guy.
I may be biased because I loved clerks, but everyone who has watched this due to my recommendations has loved it. LOVED It.
There really isn't much more to say about this movie other than it is just pure non-stop funny. Watching Kevin live, fielding questions and exuding such humor is fantastic.
There is a sequel, I haven't seen it yet but it's on my list.
It's 15 bucks new and roughly 11 used. For almost four hours of awesome, it's worth it.
Here is a short clip of it (NSFW Language)
Oh what the heck. I'm gonna throw in a Stephen King miniseries. Why? Because we are inundated with them, and this is one that is awesome.
6) Storm of the Century (Horror/Thriller)[imdb] - Skip 88 minutes again.
This movie doesn't have an all star cast. It's got a guy from wings in
it. The cast doesn't matter. I have almost no attention span and this
movie held me for 4 hours. I bought this movie when office depot was
getting rid of their DVDs back in 2000, for like 15 bucks which at the
time, was a bargain. My sister and I made a mistake of turning this
thing on at around midnight and couldn't turn it off. It is phenomenal.
This is a movie about a small town in Maine who gets the worst storm in
a 100 years. This much is obvious from the title. Then, a strange
visitor shows up, and believe me, he's not selling tupperware. This is
a man who knows the dirtiest and darkest secrets about everyone, and
wants one thing. He keeps saying, give him what he wants, and he'll
leave.
This guy is legit.
This movie freaked me out, I really enjoyed it.
I don't want to say much more as I may ruin it, buy it.
Its 7 bucks new. Buy it. Now. It's over 4 hours, and it's great.
Here is a trailer.
I have a few more that I wanted to add to this list, but I think this is enough for now, I may do a part 2 in a while. I will also be adding more installments, covering books, music, video games, and maybe even vacation spots.
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