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No Accountability Part 1 PDF Print E-mail
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Written by Dipul Patel on Wednesday, 30 April 2008
Category:Random Rants
Hits:17167

I am on a pilgrimage to recreate some accountability. The world is filled with morons I have to deal with, who really just don’t care. 

I care about my work.  I do the best I can, as do most of my friends and family.

How refreshing is it when you go to a fast food restaurant and are met with someone who just isn’t angry at life? It’s so refreshing, that I continue to go there.  I understand that most of the folks that have jobs that they define as crappy, are miserable. This is perfectly okay if you work in a cave.

If you work in customer service, this is NOT okay. I realize you hate you job, and to be frank, I DON’T FREAKING CARE.

Not even a little. You have this job, do it well or don’t do it. 

This complete decimation of customer service ties down to the utter lack repercussion for abysmal service.  Who is accountable these days?

I’m going to now go into a few stories about how accountability has completely annoyed the hell out of me, in every gamut.  From the huge companies, down to the little ones.

Let’s start with everyone’s favorite… comcast. I refuse to capitalize the c in comcast, because comcast should not be considered a proper noun, Andrew Dice Clay is more proper than that train wreck of a company.


Here is an amusing anecdote:

I have been a comcast cable internet subscriber since it was first available back in the mid 90's.  Since then, I have dealt with a level of incompetence that cannot be matched. Still,  I stuck with them. Why? Well, because they gave me a product I wanted, and they are the ONLY company that provides it. For the internet connection, DSL is slow and was non existent at the time.  For TV, while satellite is amazing as it’s true digital (which “digital cable” isn’t), the equipment at the time was cost prohibitive.

I subscribe to comcast cable internet.  I can't wait for Fios (Which should be available in a few months), but until then, I’m stuck with cable.

Last year, comcast decided to kick me off from the internet.  WOW! Why you ask? Well I was curious too.  Here is the kicker, they called my house and talked to my dad, who just happened to be over to pick up mail for me (I was on travel at the time).

Here is the message:
“THIS IS COMCAST SECURITY, CONTACT US IMMEDIATELY OR WE WILL BE FORCED TO SHUT OFF YOUR INTERNET”

This scared me about as much as a care bear, but I knew I had to get in touch with these winners immediately. So I call them, and get an answering machine.  (Who is at work at 2 pm EDT anyway?)

Now, take a deep breath, and prepare yourself for this.  The answering machine, told me to leave a phone number and they would call me back.  Well, my house line is a VOIP line, which means it won’t work if I don’t have internet, so I tell them to call my cell phone, and leave the number TWICE.   I do this every day, for about a week.

Well, in a week I haven’t heard from these guys and they cut me off of the internet.

Then, they call my house line, and Vonage (which is my VOIP line provider) emails me letting me know I have a voicemail from these bozos. Naturally, I call these morons back hoping that they aren’t completely idiotic (I call at all hours, and leave different variations of my original message in hopes that they realize I have a VOIP line.  Now, the answering machine when I call in, requires that I leave the “incident number” first, and my name and account number second.   So these idiots listen to the first half of the message I leave them, telling them case number, name and account number, and then they cease listening. Instead, they look up my house line, and call it to no avail.

Brilliant.  The level of stupidity here is dumbfounding. 

So I call customer service, to enquire what exactly I did to get kicked off of comcast.

I talk to some idiot lady on the phone, and she says that while she can’t be sure why I got kicked off, she’s absolutely certain that it is because I am spamming people.

Yes, she cant be sure, but is absolutely certain. Also, I’m spamming people.

Spam? WTF?

I tell the lady, I don't send spam.  She says, yes you do and that’s why you were kicked off.  And she has this disgusted tone of voice like she just realized she sucks at life.

Awesome, I am being judged by a comcast customer support representative.  It's like an Enron executive judging someone on ethics.

The kicker here is, I’ve been a comcast user long before this bimbo was ever working at comcast.  How about treating a long time customer with a little bit of respect? Nope, I must be sending GET LARGER P3N15 FREE!!@!!!! 

So I keep calling security (god knows, I have nothing better to do with my time then track down a crack team of retarded baboons who were fired from the geek squad at best buy), and they tell me the real reason I was kicked off was because I was using too much bandwidth.  In fact, it was all downstream.  That’s right folks, no spamming, no excessive uploading.  

Here is the dialogue that followed:

Me: What do you mean? I pay for unlimited.
comcast: Well, we don’t really mean unlimited
Me: Okay, what is the limit?
comcast: We can’t really divulge that.
Me: Why not?
comcast: Well, it’s relative.
Me: Relative how?
comcast: Each month it changes.
Me: ...... Based on what?
comcast: It’s relative.
Me: So, I guess unlimited means whatever you feel like? Is that what you mean by relative?
comcast: Just that it’s relative.
Me: So, why did the customer service lady insist that I was spamming?
comcast: Well, that’s generally why this happens. We'll turn you on now, thanks for calling!!
<<CLICK>>

Image
Even Splinter is pissed.


At this point, I had been without comcast for over 2 months… using my cell phone as my only internet connection.

I get no apology for being accused of breaking the law.  I get no apology for being without internet for two months. 

Here is the best part, they still billed me for it.  The day I got my first bill after I was shut off, and saw it on there, I called the billing department. They told me, that they will note my account, and when they turn me back on, they will credit me for the time I was off.

WOW.


No one had any accountability there. Security didn’t for not listening to my messages, or never being in the office when I called.  The comcast customer service representative didn’t have any for blatantly insulting me.  The billing department didn’t for billing me for a service that wasn’t being provided.


In a month or two, when FIOS comes to my house, will be a glorious day. Verizon is going to wipe the floor with comcast, and I can’t wait.  They could offer me everything for 30 cents a month and I would tell them to kiss my brown ass.

Doing some research, I found a fantastic article about this very problem: CLICK

This is indeed a rampant problem that comcast has no intention of fixing, why would they? 


We will continue this to another large company, US Airways.  Anyone who has ever flown any of the “Star Alliance” clearly understands the complete lack of accountability that these airlines display.

I am flying to Tucson Arizona, from Philadelphia (with a connection in Phoenix).  Now, the plane is sitting in the Philadelphia terminal, and we can’t board because US AIR forgot to book pilots for the trip! I guess that is a minor detail, forgetting to book a pilot.  Its like a hospital forgetting to book a surgeon to perform lobotomy’s on these idiots working for this company.

Needless to say, I arrive in Phoenix 2 hours late, and miss my connection.  I then go to the US AIR booth, and the guy tells me that the next flight is in an hour but I can’t get on it, not even on standby (meanwhile, the other US AIR customer service guy gets a lady to my right on that flight).  Anyway, I don’t care; Tucson is like a 90 minute drive. I call Avis and find out they have a car, I ask them to hold it for 10 minutes.

I ask for a refund, and they tell me that I can’t get one. Now, let’s recap – I was late because of a US AIR screw up. Instead of trying to screw everything up for them, I am asking them to refund my ticket so I can take a car, but they won’t.

I have to wait 4 hours, for the next connecting flight and luckily, I get on that one.  It took my just as long to fly 100 miles than the 2200 it took to get there.

And this company wonders why its going down the drain.


A few weeks later, I am flying back from Dave’s bachelor party and I had checked bags.  Since the company paid for some of the flight (There was a conference I went to nearby), I flew US AIR again.  (I wish US Air didn’t have a hub in philly).

Anyway, I’m sitting in Vegas at 11 am, hung over. I am scheduled to get home at 7 pm, in time for a nice dinner with my lady. I hear over the intercom at the airport, anyone willing to give their ticket away will get a free round trip ticket anywhere in the continental US for free, the next flight leaves at 2 pm. 

I decide not to do it, so I can go to dinner with Sandy.

Well, I we get to philly on time, but we can’t find a gate, so we sit on the plane for two hours.  That’s  TWO HOURS. It’s now 9 pm.

I finally get to baggage claim, and the bags don’t show up until 10:30 pm.  That’s right, it took 90 minutes to get the bags from the airplane to the claim.

Naturally, my bags don’t show up.  Sandy is now pissed as she’s been waiting for 5 hours at the airport.

Anyway, I go wait in a line that’s about 40 people deep, and wait.  I wait for 30 minutes, (it’s now 12:30), and I get to the front.  I ask the lady, what I do if my bag is missing. She says that I should check carousel 7.  I tell her, I’ll go check, but if its not there, I am not waiting in line again. She says that’s cool, and I go on my way. 

Image
That about sums it up


So far, while I am super annoyed, the lady has proved somewhat competent.  Now, I must note that this lady barely speaks English, and speaks with a very thick accent.  This really is irrelevant, except for the fact that this lady is put in a position to try and help people from all over the world who are angry.  Not a good mix.

Anyway, I find one of my bags (which has my camera and laptop) but the other bag is missing. So I go see her again.  She hands me this sheet of paper to describe my bag, which basically has a bunch of pictures of bags and I pick the ones that most closely resemble my bags.

So while she’s filling out the paperwork, I look at the redemption form this lady gave me, and find out the following facts.

They will pay 10 bucks per dress shirt, 100 bucks per suit, and some other ridiculously low prices for clothes.

My lost bag has two suits, about 7 dress shirts, a few pairs of slacks, random dirty laundry, two tripods and a monopod.

Here is the best part, they won’t pay for any electronics, or audio video gear.  I ask, does this include tripods and such, and they said, yes, they do not reimburse for that.

Phew, at least my socks will be paid for!

Anyway, I ask the lady, how long will it take to locate my bag, she says soon.  (Meanwhile, I hear the manager of US Air having a heated discussion with some baggage handler…. real professional douche bags).

I say soon is not quantitative, and now I get pissed.  The manager comes to see me and asks what he problem is.  I say, I want to know when you decide to stop looking for my bag, and pay me. 

He then asks me, if I want to go outside to discuss this.

I sh!t you not, he asked me that.

I said, no, I just want to know where you people are accountable for ANYTHING.

Now I am not yelling, I am not doing anything belligerent, just talking to this guy. He goes off about how he doesn’t care and they will find my bag, and if not pay me.

All I ask is, WHEN. What is the cut off? My socks are important to me.

Then I tell him, “Maybe your company, as a whole should try showing your customers a little more respect. Maybe you shouldn’t be having a screaming match with your baggage handlers in front of 40 people who are clearly not happy with the service they have received.  Maybe you should say thank you, and please, instead of demanding things.  Maybe, if your company tried at all, they wouldn’t need the federal government to bail them out of bankruptcy.”

He looked at me, told me that if I don’t hear form them in a week, to call a number and they will give me my money.

I go home, and my bag arrives the next day.

Again, no apology, no anything.

US Air is on the brink of a merger with United.  Talk about dumb and dumber. Two bloated, useless companies with the infrastructure of a flea market handling the transportation of this continent.  This will come to an end soon.  With the emergence of smaller, more efficient airlines.. and the disintegration of the "hub" model, there is no saving the big airline companies.

These companies should start to think about the customer. They should stop cutting back on costs, by giving me a freaking bag of peanuts on a 6 hour flight, showing me a VHS Movie like The Postman, and charging me for a cold sandwich with soggy bread. They should try and instill the pride that airline employees used to have in their jobs.  Employees, if you hate your job so much, stop complaining and quit... go find a better one. Don't treat the customers keeping you employed like crap.

Right now, people fly these big airlines because we have no alternatives.  This will change.  I can't wait to buy a Boeing 777, remove the US Air paint and replace with Manrants.com.  Free beer for everyone, good movies like THESE will be shown, and food will be delicious.


Its so funny, everyone i talk to with comcast hates their guts.  People despise comcast. No one who has comcast as an ISP or cable provider ever says good things about them, but... they still make tons of cash.  They currently reside in the tallest building in Philly, raising like a phallus screaming at everyone, "BEND OVER SHEEP, WE'RE COMING."

No more.
 
Verizon is on the brink of something ridiculous, with FIOS.  When FIOS takes over, the archaic system that is cable will be destroyed using state of the art optical transmissions, capable of delivering  the bandwidth and speed that will make cable feel like dialup.

Imagine streaming HD movies.  Imagine 300 HD channels.  Imagine internet so fast the bottleneck will no longer be the connection, but the speeds of your hard drives.

comcast is in a lot of trouble, and it brings a smile to my face.  Gone are the days that they charge for crap that should be free (HD Local Channels for example).  Gone are the days that I have to threaten to leave the service to get the promotional rates that new customers get.

Gone are the days of bending over like a sheep. 

Will Verizon be better, no idea, but right now, I'll take anything. In a decade FIOS will be rampant and wireless technologies which are practical for nationwide coverage of highspeed communications will be emerging, if not rampant.

Comcast, will be held accountable... and the best day will be, when manrants.com buys the comcast building, it gets painted Eagles green, and gives free  wireless to Philadelphia.

This is part 1 of a series.  Next week I'll get into some of the positive experiences I've had with large companies, and some piss poor ones with small companies.



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By:Dipul Patel
Category:Random Rants
Hits:17167
Comments
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Phillip J. Twatsberg - You're a spammer   | 70.145.171.154 | 2008-05-02 15:04:08
You are a spammer thats why we cut you off. You are a bad person and after you get out of the shower you leave the shower curtain open like some sort of prehistoric fucking savage. We live in a civilized society here, we don't need mouth-breathing knuckle-draggers like you spamming us. I'll be outside if you want to talk about this some more. Also your luggage was vibrating thats why we confiscated it. Next time, take the batteries out of your "back massager" before going on a trip. I work for Comcast and for US Airways and I hate you.
nhung - dgas   | 123.24.226.158 | 2009-04-03 23:25:45
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