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Written by Dipul Patel on Thursday, 12 June 2008
Category:Random Rants
Hits:2303

Sample Image
Paying bills is a just annoying, so is USPS. Did you know, you can buy a car on ebay? A house? An island?

Did you know that faxes with signatures are considered okay, but people still feel wary of emailing a signature?

Let me get this straight, I can sign a piece of paper, have it scanned by the low resolution scanner on a fax machine, sent to another fax machine through a voice line and re-printed on an equally low resolution printer?

Anyone remember the movie multiplicity, when they made a copy of a copy? That’s what happens to my pristine signature when I sign papers to buy a house and fax it.
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Fantastic movie, watch it.


FAX IT.

I realize that there are certain institutions that allow emailed signatures, or offer a method of signing a document electronically, but this is far from a standard.

Why do I bring this up, it’s because I wanted to automatically pay my electric bill.  I am sick of sending checks through the mail.  SO, in order to allow direct transfers of cash, the electric company wants a signed document authorizing it… and it can be faxed or mailed in.

That’s right folks, I can’t scan the document, and email it; it has to be faxed.

So, I do this, but still have to pay this bill for this month.  Of course, my electric company doesn’t have an online paying method, so I still have to send a check.  I fill out my check, put it in the envelope and put a stamp on it.

It’s a 41 cent stamp.  I bought 40 of these stupid things a few months ago so I could pay bills.

Of course, USPS decided to raise the prices to 42 cents.  That’s right folks, I have to add a 1 cent stamp to this envelope… SO I ask around, and find out that everyone I know buys “forever stamps.”  These stamps cost the same amount as a first class stamp, but will never expire… in that they have no value on them so they will always work.

So, 2 months ago a forever stamp would cost me 41 cents, or a 41 cent stamp would cost me 41 cents…. So tell me, why is my stamp insufficient? Shouldn’t USPS do me a favor and just let me use my remaining 41 cent stamps? Nope, I should go buy penny stamps.
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Forever, until USPS arbitrarily decides it's expired.


I realize I should have bought forever stamps, pardon me for not knowing the inner workings of the USPS, I’m not Newman after all.

All I want to do is go buy 30 bucks in penny stamps, and just use those from now on.  I’ll attach 42 of them to every letter I send out.
I wish I could do what Kramer did in Seinfeld and ask to just not receive mail… although this guy scares the hell outta me.
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Post Master General


So I decide to pay some other bills, and I notice a theme.  I have to pay a convenience fee for paying online, even if I transfer money directly from my checking account. (I know I can set up bill pay through my bank, but that isn't the issue here..)

How the hell does this make sense? I pay a bill online, the money is to the company near instantaneously, and they have almost no paperwork to handle. They have no check to cash, no mail to sort, and no trash to deal with. Why the hell am I paying for this convenience, which LOWERS the overhead of these companies, if anything, I should be paid for taking human error out of the equation, which is probably rampant within those organizations anyway.

Maybe I should send checks like this one.
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The following is a video that was the inspiration for the check above. Please watch this, please, for the love of god, everyone watch this... People are so stupid it makes my head hurt.  These are the same oganizations that charge me a fee for taking their all-star employees out of the equation.  They should honor me by giving me their first born for using electronic payment methods.

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By:Dipul Patel
Category:Random Rants
Hits:2303
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