Written by Dave Homsher on Monday, 14 July 2008 Category:Random Hits:3824

This past weekend I spent a few days with my family at the New Jersey shore.  Despite the shore being one of my personal favorite spots, I found myself thoroughly annoyed by some of the ridiculously stupid things found only at the shore. 

1. CASH ONLY – Just about every place down the shore has got a sign letting potential patrons know “Sorry, no credit cards.  Cash only.”  Are you serious?  What era are these cave men living in?  Most of the people I know under the age of 30 rarely carry ANY cash on them, let alone enough to afford the extremely high prices of the Jersey shore.  It’s 2008!!!!  There’s no reason that I can’t simply swipe my credit card and get out of there ASAP.  The cash only rule makes people constantly go to ATMs and pay extravagant fees in order to get cash from their bank accounts.  WHAT A HASSLE!!

2. SMOKING TEENAGERS – I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many teenagers smoking cigarettes in my own life.  There’s no doubt in my mind that just about all of them will turn out to be losers when they grow up.  Isn’t there enough information out there about cigarette’s now?  It’s not like kids of this era don’t know about the repercussions.  I can understand how current parents and grandparents can become addicted to smoking.  They didn’t know all of the negative things about smoking back in those days.  Although word has gotten out, it’s very difficult to quit after years of addiction.  However, kids KNOW that smoking causes cancer, and they still choose to do it.  Besides that, how can they even AFFORD to buy cigarettes?  They are up over $4 per pack just about everywhere and cost even more than that in quite a few places.  You’re TWELVE YEARS OLD!!  DON’T SMOKE!!!!  IT DOESN’T MAKE YOU COOL!

Not cool.

3. GRASS – For some reason people seem to feel an urge to put grass on their 3 square feet of yard space down the shore.  The problem is, the entire area down there is made of sand, and grass doesn’t grow AT ALL on the sand down there.  It tends to come in really patchy and looks pretty terrible.  It also necessitates the need for expensive lawn equipment in order to maintain your 14 year-old’s mustache of a lawn, but I guess if you can afford a house down the shore, you can afford a few pieces of yard equipment. 

Most of the lawns look even worse than this.

 
4. CIRCLES – Why do I need to drive around a circle in order to reach the shore?  Who designed these abominations anyway?  The simple intersection wasn’t exciting enough for you?  Since there approximately 700 billion cars trying to get into the shore on a weekend evening, you can guarantee that the circle is going to add at least ½ hour to your travel time.  No one can get on the circle since there is so much through traffic, and cars back up for MILES trying to make their way to their destination. 

5. EXPENSIVE GOLF – Listen, I know that people who own shore houses tend to have a good bit of cash.  I also know that due to the limited number of golf courses, supply and demand is in full effect.  But at the same time, there are a lot of people who visit the shore who aren’t millionaires, and who still want to play a few rounds of golf.  I played this past Saturday with my grandfather, who I don’t get to see very often.  We hit up a course called Twisted Dune.  Although it was a GORGEOUS course in tip-top condition, it certainly wasn’t worth the absurd amount of money we paid to play it.  The course cost us ONE HUNDRED AND NINE DOLLARS EACH!!  I play 4 rounds for that much money in Syracuse!  I shouldn’t have to take out a loan in order to play a round of golf with my grandfather.     

The shore’s got a lot of great things, but it’s got even more bullcrap making it difficult to have a good time.  Let’s hope people wise up, and start making the area better for everyone to visit. 

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